make me purr

I am so in love with her. She doesn’t even really know it – or then again, she probably does. We’ve been together for about eighteen blissful months, which is pretty long for me. I moved in at month two – fulfilling the punchline of every U-haulling joke I’d ever heard.

She shot me down earlier. I was kind of hoping for just a little – a little cuddling, a little affection, maybe a little sex…but she’s tired. She’s stressed out from work and she has to get up in the morning. Didn’t stop her from spending an hour straightening her hair, or watching TV upstairs, or doing her nails when she could have been doing me..

Hell, I would have been happy just to do her, without her returning the favor.  I miss running my tongue and lips over her soft skin, tracing the outline of the tattoo on her back with my fingernails. Her eyes are so beautiful, this mossy shade of hazel that reminds me of a forest in springtime. I know, I know, she has to work, she has to sleep, but I long for just one little kiss with some passion behind it – a little fire, just a spark! She says that once she gets me going I always ask for more, but that’s not true – I can take care of myself if I have to.

It wasn’t always this way – when we first starting seeing each other, the fire was there. We nearly tore each other’s clothes off on my balcony and in her car. I kissed her so hard she cut her tooth on her lip. We both walked funny for days. The first few months we got so little sleep that the dark circles under our eyes and our perm-grins became a running joke among our friends. I’d fall asleep tangled in her arms and legs, the bedclothes scattered here and there around the room.

Now I sit up late, frustrated, reading about others’ adventures and honing my imagination.

It seems we have a new poster, kitten. I had to laugh, seeing your name, kitten, thinking of the two of us (and who knows, there may be others) as a couple of little kittens crawling around in a bunch of kitty toys and pillows and blankies and other things kittens have.

mew

I had a pretty good weekend, fairly productive, and this week is starting off well too. However, I’m just having one of those days. I didn’t get quite enough sleep last night, and all I can think about are a couple things…..

Should I go upstairs to bed and get some sleep?

Should I go upstairs to bed and *pretend* to sleep? Heh – I tried taking care of business last night and fell asleep before I could finish. When that happens I’m left rather…frustrated… all the next day.

Maybe I should take a nap on the couch, and then work on cleaning house some more. It’s not going to clean itself.

Or…. mmmmmmmm maybe I should draw myself a hot bath, and pour in some of that special handmade bubble bath I’ve been saving – the merlot scented bubble bath. While the tub fills I could put a couple towels in the tub (I hate it when my slippery little butt slides on the porcelain), blow up the bath pillow, and maybe lean against the new homedics shaitsu pillow I bought. Add a couple scented candles, my favorite Anais Nin book, and a glass of wine, and that could be a great afternoon…

(Then upstairs to pretend to sleep!)

Fine. You want something hot and steamy to warm up your weekend? You got it.

The summer after high school I met a guy. Not just *any* guy, but a guy who was smart, funny, cute…He’d read some of the same books I had, had taken some of the same classes. I don’t date dummies as a general rule. (Date, no. Boink like a rabid weasel, sometimes, but never date).. The thing is, he was slated to enter the seminary that fall.  The Catholic seminary.  I knew this within a few minutes of meeting him.

That didn’t really matter – or maybe it just mattered all the more. He was bound and determined to get in enough sex to make it last throughout the rest of his cold, lonely life. He’d pick me up early in the morning, and he’d go to church.  I’d read outside, or wander around the graveyard in back, or read in the graveyard out back. He’d come outside afterwards,drag me off into the bushes, and have his wild ways with me.

Oh that summer was crazy. The nearby church was out far enough in the boonies that they still left their doors open at night. I don’t know if they’d worked something out with F, maybe they knew he liked to come in and pray late at night. That wasn’t all that happened.  We christened the pews, the choir loft, even the confessional. I drew the line at actually doing it on the alter. I figured there was no way to avoid being struck by lightning if we went that far. 

The graveyard held the bones of his ancestors. We used the headstone of his great-grandfather as a brace more than once. Although those were the places that, to this day, win me drinks, we didn’t stop there. He had a Beetle, and I was still pretty flexible. Only once did he actually run the car up onto the sidewalk (and had to explain what happened to the cop a few cars back)…but it wasn’t for lack of enthusiasm on my part. Parks, more parks, parking lots, way out in the back forty of the nearby farms, anywhere we could get to, as long as I was home by midnight.

*laugh* I was reading your posts, and thought it might be fun to just tease you – and anyone else reading this – a little bit…

I’m not the type of women you’d include in your Bukkake Files. I’m so pale I almost glow in the dark.  I’ve been with a couple of guys with significantly darker skin than mine, and the contrast was so interesting I was nearly distracted from the sex.

I smoke, I drink, I swear, but all things in moderation. I have curves, and while the twig-like models I see downtown would probably think I should lose weight, at least I can fill out a dress the way it should be filled out. I think there’ s more sensuality in ordering the steak than the salad…unless I happen to want the salad that day. I’ll order dessert if I want it. I’ll relish every last bit of the chocolate mousse… I love my silk nightgowns and panties, as well as my leather corset.  I have plenty of toys, and I don’t hesitate to use them when I am in the mood.  I even *gasp* have a few vintage furs. If you care, they are all older than I am, older than my mother – the animal would have died a long time ago, anyway.

You had a point – silentpillow IS a dirty little secret. I’ve tried to encourage a certain someone to read it… but I just don’t think they are interested. I do have other dirty little secrets too… Maybe one of these days I’ll get around to writing about them.

No, never fear, my dear causticj36, I’m here… Just sitting back, remembering some of my wilder adventures…and while doing that, letting my fingers do the walking…

     I was planning on moving soon, to join my boyfriend on the other side of the country.  For now, though, just for the summer, I was a waitress at a little restaurant  high up in the mountains.  The work wasn’t that difficult, though I suppose had I stayed through the winter the traffic would have increased. My coworkers were all young and good-looking, both the boys and the girls, and if not the brightest bulbs on the tree, at least ..enthusiastic…

     One of the perks of working there was a free dinner and a free pint of locally brewed beer at the end of my shift. I usually didn’t partake of the beer, since I had a long drive home.  Sometimes I would, on the weekends. This was a Saturday night. The place had been dead for hours, and we were all sitting around. The manager closed up a little early, and started buying us shots.  Pretty soon we decided that serving ourselves was too much like work, so we finished up and left for the other bar in town.

   It was a very small town.

   While we were there, we ran into one of the park and rec guys.  We bought him a few shots, and after a bit of flirting, he succumbed to the suggestion that we go skinny-dipping in the pool. The manager went back to the restaurant and bought a few bottles, and the bunch of us headed over to the nice, indoor pool. There was some steam rising off it, obscuring my now naked coworkers, boss, park and rec guy, and a few other bar patrons we’d picked up along the way. Someone handed me a beer, and a cigarette, and I waded over to the shallow end, trying to keep both out of the water. 

     I could hear the giggles and the splashes from my little corner of the pool, a few high squeaks of surprise, the sounds of bottles being opened…Here and there I saw the flash of a lighter for a few moments, and the glow of an ember.  I kept to the edge of the pool, repeating all the while to myself that I was seeing someone – that I was moving soon – that I should stay faithful.  Eventually I found the hot tub, and a few people were in there, chatting and smoking and drinking. I joined them, and leaned back against a low jet.  I knew at least a couple of those people were messing around under the froth of the bubbles.  I didn’t really care. The steam kept blowing around, and the beer kept flowing. I felt a couple of hands explore my knees and thighs, one from one direction, and one from the other direction a few minutes later. I pushed them away – but the hot jet of water wasn’t a hand. I turned and leaned against it so that it was even more relaxing, closed my eyes, drank my beer, and simply listened to the goings-on all around me.  The heat of the water had already reddened my face, and since I was facing away from the center, no one saw me bite my lip trying to stay quiet.

I’d been bored all day. It had been a long day at work, and after getting home and cleaning up I decided to call the chatline. I wound up talking with Robert. He described himself as very sexy, blond with blue eyes, and a donkey-sized penis. It was the quip about the donkey-sized penis that got me – I like my men to have a sense of humor. I told him I was sexy as well, a curvy woman with red hair and green eyes, and that I liked it up my ass. We joked for a while about donkeys and asses, then decided we had to meet that very night. I drove over to the café we agreed upon. In the spirit of the moment, we’d found a local one that featured a picture of a donkey above the door. The café was named Jenny’s…I got a latte and waited. He showed up about five minutes later, blond and blue-eyed as promised. I hoped his other statements were true too. I tried to sneak a look down at his jeans, but he turned at the last second and I only saw the ass of his pants. It was still a nice view. Then I tried to look at his hands – you know what they say about the size of a man’s penis in relation to his hands…This time he caught me looking and smiled. “If you want to see my penis so much, let’s go to the bathroom,” Robert said. I was surprised but not shocked. He went first, finishing his coffee as he went. I waited a minute, then followed. The bathroom was empty except for us. He led me into a stall and locked the door. He grinned and unzipped his pants. His penis was already stiff and bulged out of his jeans as soon as it was free. Apparently Robert didn’t like being stuffed into underwear. That was fine – neither do I. “I’ve shown you mine, now you show me yours!” he said. I flipped up my skirt, showing him my firm, round ass and my damp pussy. He reached out and ran his hand along my ass, then got his fingers nice and wet. “I brought some lube, but it looks like we won’t need it, will we?” I smiled. His wet fingers slid back around to my ass, and gently pressed a finger inside, all the way to his knuckle. He whispered in my ear how sexy he thought I was, then suggested we leave before we get caught. He was barely able to stuff his rock-hard penis back in his jeans, and somehow we managed to sneak out to his car without looking “obvious”. We drove around in his car for a short while, then he stopped along a dimly lit road. “I haven’t ‘parked’ since high school. Do you want to?” I loved the glint in his eyes. I said sure, and he nearly ripped my skirt off of me. The car had bench seats, and I leaned over the front one with my ass up in the air. I heard the sound of a condom wrapper opening, then a bit of sticky coldness as he rubbed his lubed-up penis against my rear. “You are so sexy” he whispered, over and over in my ear. He entered my ass slowly at first, gently, but then he started to really get into it. “Your ass is so tight…I love fucking such a tight little asshole.” Faster and faster, and as he pounded, I reached down and played with my clit. I could feel his penis getter harder, longer, and even hotter as he fucked me, and we came at the same time. It was wonderful. He drove me back to Jenny’s, a bit stickier and sweatier than when we’d left, and gave me his number. We’ve dated for a while, off and on. I just love the way he fucks my ass like that.